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Episode 137
Episode 137 is an episode of the Drunken Peasants. It features the return of everyone's favorite Ass, Jim. Jim caused the audience to suffer from ear rape because he was drunk. This episode was a clusterfuck of the hosts and Jim Ass shouting incoherently about stupid bullshit. The episode's reception is probably the most polarized of any DP episode, even more so than Episode 69. Prev: Episode 136 Next: Episode 138 Highlights * Drunken Peasants get EXPOSED. * The Suck-Fuck madness - 0:13:28 * Cunt Hovind accepts the challenge to debate on DP. * The peasants laughing like a pack of hyenas - 0:42:57 * Butt King chills with his bitches in a hot tub. * A twerking ass and a jizz-encrusted dildo. Videos Played #Troll or Not a Troll Segment: The Drunken Peasants are Lying Frauds! #Kent Hovind: Dr. Kent Hovind Responds To "Drunken Peasants" Invitation #The Vigilant Christian: Kent Hovind Accepts The Drunken Peasant Debate Challenge! #The Vigilant Christian: Vigilant Christian's Apology to The Amazing Atheist #Brett Keane: Hot Tub at the Spa with Brett Keane #A video of a stupid sloth claiming that atheists are destroying the Earth #Planned Parenthood Is Like Killing Cecil (not found) #Free Press Media: Atheists are right some of the time (not found) #Roosh V: The Truth Behind "Rape Culture" Hysteria #PragerU: Why I Left Greenpeace Stupid Ad Segment *Super Back *Easy Reach Loofa *Magic Gate *Crystyler *Rollie Egg Master *Pornhub's Twerking Butt *Jizz Dildo Demo Start of the Show The episode was aired late because their mouse was dying and required a battery replacement. Scotty, customarily, gave the mouse head (mouse-to-mouse resuscitation) and sucked its laser balls. Jim Ass and the Drunken Peasants discussed the customs of testicle-to-door entry for a good two minutes, for humanity must know the truth. They then watched a Troll or Not a Troll video by a guy who appears to be the retarded lovechild of The Vigilant Christian and Ryan Wiley. The guy in the video exposes TJ to be a misogynistic, suicide supporting, drug abusing liar who hates humanity. He also reveals the truth that Scoopy is not TJ's brother but was adopted by TJ, thus proving that Scotty Cena is TJ's real brother. He then suspects that Ben is trying to hide something because Ben refuses to show his face due to his criminal past where he's escaping from the CIA, FBI, and the KGB. The incident was yet again kept under wraps thanks to the quick cover work of Ben and TJ against Scotty's whistleblowing. Next, the professional windbag, Kent Hovind responds to the Drunken Peasants' invitation to a debate on the show for all the viewers' intellectual stimulation. Hovind made a bunch of terms and conditions and The Drunken Pissants agreed to all of them. TJ then spanked Jim Ass's ass with a rusty nail paddle for revealing that the show is prerecorded by the Satanic Illuminati-Jesuit Order Alliance (SILJOA). TJ then healed Jim Ass's Ass with his magical Mr. Myagi massage powers and Jim Ass reveals that Atheism-is-Unstoppable is Ben's father. The Peasants then exposed the Vigilant Christian for being a hypocrite when he was protesting "Brother" Kunt Hovind's decision to debate the Peasants. Jim Ass called out Mario and TJ dropped a rap dissing Mario, proving that he's #Gay4Jesus. TVC then makes an apology to TJ. Next, the peasants looked at a screenshot from Sims where Brett Keane was in a hot tub. Middle of the Show The peasants watched a video by a cretinous Sloth who just underwent facial reconstruction surgery. He presented us with the irrefutable axiom that atheists are destroying the Earth by practicing science. This deranged retard spends most of the video laughing maniacally and talking 5 octaves too high for a grown man because his vocal cords are aging backwards. Subsequently, some pro-life cocksucker started talking about the death of Cecil the Lion in Africa at the hands of a complete monster from Minnesota. He used Cecil's death to discuss abortion, by raising questions for the ages like "I mean it's sad that Cecil died, but what about all these babies?". Then, they listened to a new song from the brilliant, Bob Dylan-esque singer that is Free Press Media. Roosh V began advocating for the legalization of rape to drive down the rate of rape. Makes sense, after all the perfect way to drive down violent crime rates is to legalize the violent crimes and make them free for all to commit. Specifically, he wanted to legalize rape on private property. It must be the perfect opportunity for Walmart to start selling those "Beware of Guard Rapist" signs like they've always wanted. A recovering hippie from Prager University discussed why he left Greenpeace. Finding this agonizingly boring, the Peasants took "a ten minute break" to spank Jim Ass and recuperate. End of the Show Since it was Friday, the Drunken Peasants finally entered the Stupid Ad Segment and watched some stupid ads. The show closed with an impassioned speech from Jim Ass. Quotes *''"Eat a dick... motherfucker."'' - Jim Ass *''"More whisky for Jim."'' - TJ supporting alcoholism *''"I protect the babies from Mario."'' - Jim Ass *''"Do you also rape women like Bill Cosby, Jim Ass?"'' - TJ *''"Inuit? More like inushit. "'' - TJ *''"I'm holding out for a rapist, I'm holding on till the end of the night! He's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast.... "'' - All women ever in response to Roosh V's proposition to legalize rape *''"I'm gonna lick Roosh V's butthole."'' - TJ Kirk *''"Fuck Japan in their USSR's. With their fuckin'... G.I. J.O.E. guns."'' - Jim Ass *"Have an ice cold glass of Colgate" - Scotty *''"TJ, drape the cape to avoid the rape."'' - Jim Ass *''"Bill O' Reilly has never massaged my boob."'' - TJ Kirk *''"The Magic Gate comes out of my penis... EVERYNIGHT!"'' - Jim Ass *''"I hunger.... FOR EGGS!!!" ''- Ben Trivia *Ben is on the run from the KGB. *TJ is the offspring of Rick Flair and the Undertaker . *Bible World was the worst Super Mario world. *Devon Tracey is Ben's father. *The Peasants now sponsor Colgate. *Jim Ass's real, full name is James Keister. * Jim Ass protects the babies for 1500 dollars and hour. *William Shatner should probably cover Hotel California. Disclaimer Offended? -> Disclaimer Page Sagas Category:Drunken Peasants Episodes Category:Episodes featuring Patreon Guests Category:Episodes featuring Jim Ass Category:Episodes featuring Guests